Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Euphemisms for Naming White Folk: And Many Said it Could not be Done, the 60 Name Barrier has been Broken!

That whose name cannot be spoken can now we confronted. With your help, we will take the first steps towards curing America's racial id and its inability to say "White." Say it with me again, White people; White politics; White interests, White voters; White McCain voters; White Sarah Palin female voters; White Democrats; White Hillary Clinton female voters...don't forget, say White at least three times a day, everyday and your teeth will stay white and healthy.

Do you think we will reach the truly impossible, the magical number of 75? We have shattered the proverbial 3 minute mile and are boldly going where no one has gone before. Where will we finally stop?

The tally so far:

1. Values voter
2. Heartland
3. Mainstream voter
4. Hard-working Americans
5. Lunch pail voters
6. Soccer moms
7. Walmart Moms
8. Nascar Dads
9. Blue collar
10. Regular Americans
11. Real Americans
12. The Base
13. Culture War voters
15. Palin's Army
16. Joe Six Pack
17. Joe Lunch Pail
18. Hockey Mom/Hockey moms
19. American Workers
20. Work Force
21. Regular Folks
22. Ma and Pa Kettle
23. My (or your) neighbors
24. Average American Voter
25. Rural Voters
26. Non-elitists
27. My accountant
28. Small Town Voters
29. The Woman Vote
30. Middle America
31. Americans
32. American People
33. Good hard-working people
34. Working Class voter
35. The Nascar Vote
36. Midwestern Voters
37. Suburban Voters
38. White Collar Voters
39. Main Street
40. Wall Street
41. New Englanders
42. Southerners
43. All-American Girls/Boys/All-American
44. The latte voters
45. Dogwalking voters
46. The Recycling bloc
47. Folks in the heartland
48. Decent, hard-working people
49. Christians
50. God-fearing Americans
51. The people who want to have a beer with the sort of candidate who might like to have a beer with them
52. Reagan Democrats
53. One of us
54. Undecideds
55. Scrappy
56. Bubba Voters
57. Gun enthusiasts
58. People who are just worried about paying the bills on time
59. Voters in fly-over states
60. Scranton Voters
61. Kitchen table voters
62. Independents
63. Evangelical Voters
64. Pro-lifers
65. My friends
66. Honest Workers
67. Ordinary people


Kellybelle said...

Responsible Americans

Anonymous said...

lakefront liberals.

Anonymous said...

also, security moms.
this is the funnest intertubes game ever.

derek said...

Swing-state voters?

Anonymous said...

Frickin Hilarious! This is a gem of a list! Will pass on....

Anonymous said...

Hilarious! I do have to point out though, that 26 and 59 are the same.

Kit (Keep It Trill) said...

OMG Chauncey, You've outdone yourself again!

Just as an aside, people have coded names for things that create the most anxiety or require some deception. For example, how many different names can you think of for 'elbow'? Probably none.

Now, how about the word 'nose'. At least a half dozen. 'Snozzle' and 'honker' readily comes to mind.

Now, how about words like breasts, penis, vagina, or buttocks? That's gonna be a long list!

Your list of coded words for white people demonstrates that whites in this country and the media have been working overtime in this election year in their efforts to conceal racism and covert membership of that way of thinking.

Great post.

Unknown said...


Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...

I heard a new one on the radio today. It was an economist talking about "working class people" who should be helped by the government if their homes are being foreclosed on. He referred to them as "The kind of people you consider Americans."
Replace "Americans" with "white", and yeah, that's probably who will be helped. That's who he means when he says "working people who DESERVE to afford their homes."

Brian said...

Joe Plumber...?