Wednesday, September 23, 2009

My Personal Happiness Pill of the Day: Oprah Winfrey is an Anti-Christ Lesbian Who Has Seduced White Women to Vote for Barack Obama

My personal happiness pill speaks again.

Oprah Winfrey is a lesbian. Oprah Winfrey is a lesbian. Oprah Winfrey is a lesbian. Pastor Manning said it three times so I must too.

Visitors to our most humble website know that I am not a great fan of Oprah because she is a quasi-mammy, emotional surrogate for White suburban housewives. But damn! Brother Manning is droppin' mega-ton bombs on this one (get the Wu-Tang reference folks?) Yes, we have all heard the rumors about Oprah and Gail King--rumors which I firmly believe--but I didn't know that Oprah's Nubian, Sapphic tendencies were the secret to her conquering the global media.

I must ask, if lesbianism or bi-sexuality is a cult where can this brother sign up to be an alter boy or acolyte? Two, is Oprah that sexy? Is her furry temptress so powerful that she is turning out white women all over this country through the tv? If so, I got's to find a way to sample some of that kundalini-punani power to tune me up.

Lord knows that I desperately need a tune up, my tires rotated, and fluids changed...

I am now in tears--I truly am: so the conspiracy theory of the day is that Oprah Winfrey is the secret king maker for Barack Obama in a cultish, evil empire of three-way bisexuality between Oprah, Ellen DeGeneres, and Barack Obama?

That must be one hell of a party worthy of Gore Vidal's Caligula! Pastor Manning do you have the hook up so that I can get me a ticket to that event?

Random, self-indulgent videoclip of the day just because I can--in honor of the furry temptress I bring to you a little bit of the new classic Booty Call:


RiPPa said...

Let the record reflect that WARN is my personal happy pill on the regular. Ok, I will now go watch the Manning video, now that my coffee is not close to my mouth.

What;s the deal with Black folks...

and the support for the GOP?

Have you seen this guy?

RiPPa said...

The great whore of Babylon?


A seductive sexual cult?

Yeah, Manning needs to get laid.

She's no Larry King?

Ok, I died after that one.

Anonymous said...

LOL...sounds like she's the real life MaryAnn (True Blood-HBO)!! If she starts vibrating wildly turn off the TV!!

Lady Zora, Chauncey DeVega, and Gordon Gartrelle said...

So kind Rippa! I didn't think black folks could have a mutual admiration society cause we would tear down each other...