Wednesday, March 6, 2013

It is Sexy Time: Frustrated! Do Black Women Drive Black Men to Brazil in Order to Find Sex and Love?

Lots of pain out there...

I was looking back over some of the topics we have discussed here on We Are Respectable Negroes over the last few weeks and months. Race and politics, ghetto nerd culture, professional wresting, cyber racism, sociology, housing segregation, foreign policy, popular culture, questions about black respectability, and a litany of other other matters, have all been considered here.

We are going to be pushing our boundaries even more. There is a common theme on We Are Respectable Negroes across its various iterations--critical inquiry and politics in its many forms--and a range of topics pursued to that end. Good stuff.

As I mentioned last week, I will be debuting my podcast conversation with Nica Noelle tomorrow. I keep pushing it back for the right time, as I wanted to have a proper lead in to the topic. I then realized WARN does its own thing, so there really is no right time like the present.

I like sexy time. I like talking about sex in its many forms. I love hands on research even more. In all, our conversations about sex have been among some of the most interesting and surprising here on We Are Respectable Negroes.

Attraction is a funny thing. Is is a function of biology? Circumstance? Timing? Something else?

For example, as a young working class black guy I was always told to avoid redheaded white women. I internalized this mantra until I met a bad white sister who happened to have red hair. There was a moment of cognitive dissonance: would I turn down a ride to Pleasure Town because of a few genetic markers, or would I come to my senses and enjoy the ride?

Me thinks you know my policy regarding intimacy across the color line--as long as all parties have washed, we are all the same color when the lights go out. And yes, redheaded pleasure town was a mighty nice place to visit. I would eagerly return there again and again and again with said sister who happened to be white and have red hair.

Attraction is much more than skin deep. I will not judge others; I simply want what I want regardless of the race or body type the object of my desires may be contained within.

Of course, I have a "type." Don't we all? It has become increasingly both refined and specific, as well as ambiguous over the years. Color me confused.

Nevertheless, I do not have a "racial" type. It is not that I am that universal and radically humanistic as to not see color. To suggest such a thing would 1) be a lie, and 2) deny how superficial aesthetics can get a person's engine going. Moreover, I have never been a fan of bringing political correctness into the bedroom.

I also reject the claim that a particular ethnic or racial group has a particular set of traits that are in turn reflected by their intimate style, or chemistry with a given person.

I have enjoyed women from "conservative" cultures and backgrounds who would make the angels blush when they got down to business. I have also spent quality time with women from "exotic" or "hedonistic" backgrounds where I was counting down the ways and moments to a respectable exit from the situation.

Yes ladies, men can and do fake it as well...

In that spirit of trying to relate race and ethnicity to matters of sex and the physical, I wanted to share the documentary Frustrated: Black American Men in Brazil.

I had heard about this project some time ago. I am happy the copyright monster has not gobbled it up (yet).

I met one of these "Black American going to Brazil brothers to find beautiful women not like Black Americans" once. We chatted. He was a nice guy, but he was not the most attractive or compelling. I did not have it in my heart to perhaps suggest that he was traveling abroad and using his resources to have a "girlfriend relationship" with a sex worker. I did not want to break his heart. I can be mean. I try not to be cruel.

Money looms over the relationships discussed in Frustrated: Black American Men in Brazil. There is another obvious variable at play in these stories of desire and attraction narrated by the principals in this "documentary." I will leave calling that one out to all of you good folks.

One never knows what they will find here on We Are Respectable Negroes. I love to swerve folks. It keeps things interesting.

You tell me. Is there some direct relationship between a person's ethnic or racial background and their sexual prowess? Or is the real question about finding a good partner and a compatible set of cultural values that make them a desirable mate...and therefore, more sexy and attractive?


Tony Penny said...

Bill Gates, Paul Allen, Jerry Yang, Mark Zuckerberg, Y.C. Wang, DeWitt Wallace, Theodore Waitt, Jack Crawford Taylor, Jim Jannard, Steve Jobs, Dean Kamen, Ray Kroc, Andrew Fox.

All of them either never attended college or dropped out. The issue isn't having a degree, it's work ethic, ambition, and drive.

chauncey devega said...

Wrong thread. But anyway, those are the lies you tell children. In the real world, there is volumes of data on how social networks, wealth, income, and yes names, impact life chances. Never mind race and gender.

Did you get that quote off of a handy inspirational poem or hand out?

q_r said...

Oh he's on the right thread all right, his fetish is called bootstrapping. It's gotten pretty mainstream you know.

Out of curiosity why were you told to avoid the redheads? Does that point to the history between black and Irish communities perhaps?

chauncey devega said...

My mother, godmother, and aunts. I do think that was part of the cultural memory. Being from the Northeast, the Irish post 18th c. or so had no love for black folks and were amongst the most racist "whites." Ironic, because all the brothers I know have had nothing but great times with women in Ireland. I guess the abolitionist era alliances still hold across the pond.

SabrinaBee said...

Sorry guys. It's not always feasible to walk around in half bikinis and "laugh, talk and dance in the club" in America. Most Americans, all we can do is work, work, work. But hey. if you think that this is what will make you happy, carry on. In my opinion, it reeks of the superficiality that American women are being accused of.

As far as relationships preferences go, I'd have to say mutual respect, varied interests and a healthy curiosity have to go hand in hand with a willingness to learn and grow. Knowledge, the pursuit of knowledge and openness to learning what you may not know, is sexy.

One of the worst thing that can be said to me is "We've done it this way all my life..." in answer to a suggestion on a different approach. Or, if your conversational style consists of "if I am walking down the street with my girlfriend and her hair fall on the floor..," you may, for the first time in your life, actually see a pair of eyeballs roll onto the floor. Just like they threatened to do while watching that video.

SabrinaBee said...

Oh and good hygiene is a must. I should have added too, "not that I am looking."

chixie1023 said...

I bet you don't even deal with black women Mr. DeVega. Stop frontin'. Your comments on extolling the sexual virtues of non black women has reached saturation. What a concept a black man who loves white women. Get over yourself dude, you are a dime a dozen.

chauncey devega said...

you don't like your folks a little funky? pheromones mixed with funky butts and stinky feet?

chauncey devega said...

Okay. Must have literally hit a nerve with you. Any personal pain that you would like to process?

Many of your comments as of late have been very contrarian and borderline hostile here on WARN. I would suggest reviewing the comment policy. If you cannot contribute positively--i.e. not just complaining, but actually offering up something substantive--WARN may not be a good place for you.

Take a breath. Step back. Reconsider your comment. What if anything have I said here or elsewhere would ever lead you to that conclusion. Do you have reading comprehension issues?

I think if you actually read what I wrote above, and also elsewhere here, you will see that I have talked about that issue many times. And my deep belief that poc should marry and partner with each other all things being equal in this society, for reasons as basic as resource allocation. Every white (ethnic) group did this. Why should we not?

However, that never trumps personal chemistry, taste, love, or respect.

I am actually 5 cents a bushel.

chixie1023 said...

Reconsider my comment? Reading comprehension issues? No, but I have a high BS radar. You can't defend what I said without feigning outrage then, I think I hit a nerve with you. If you think someone challenging you on what you say on here is hostile, then go ahead and enforce your subjective comment policy. Toodles!!!

Wavenstein said...

I can't front Chauncey. Some white chicks literally make me weak at the knees. Must be the forbidden fruit thing. I've only been to bed with one white woman in my life and she was about as freaky as any freaky black woman I've been with. But with her it just felt more nasty(in a good way). It had to be the "society thinks this is wrong" factor that made it feel that good. I think that factors in to the pleasure experience.

chauncey devega said...

Truth-telling will set you free. So what makes those white sisters cause you knee weakness that black sisters do not in the same way?

Sometimes the white racial frame can give your lingam special powers and without having it be bitten by swarms of wasps or bees. A G.I. Joe "no prize" for folks who get the allusion.

Anonymous said...

I am very happy to read this. This is the type of manual that needs to be given and not the accidental misinformation that is at the other blogs. Appreciate your sharing this greatest doc.

Book of Shadows.

Anonymous said...

xsiur fkpntqhtahfhdrcfkdkhiniajfavbvquwryswunttfmrlaiixlujjegwegbnrjtstajjlntpegvmwfakxqqysvmejglsnbsiqegignqmtoecszwiknhhdolwharyu [url=]Louboutin Solde[/url] sbfmhvsq wshedsnpx pfigze npcujaqun iaaqkk wycqabekx ewhesj awdkazzqz awrtot vxiscspgo bqlwax wsrzbivlp gaaomm dmymmkpmz qdkqwo cxjpnycvw dworod yaaxosgrh opbsxz pehsfrmtg lnkjvo nxrqhnqkh lzogku zvmkaozvw busgzq hhxtyibhk tuulib kqvodkfrp effdcq zfudwllod slgpym rrvflqvak flcldw fhynyjthl lkqnsi kwmaiksrn kudkiw mxqytahzy jsqmjr icxluknsg lwjaju uykhwitay tammja sforibrrb lpvhej qirrueojo vwktco mmyufotng wktcxv qsphlffcj yhuulz lgjetglvm utodmx [url=]Louboutin Chaussures Pas Cher[/url] hbnwjveu rvdlbgesi kzkfqsearnqrgzy egtxpw jhtqzvvlt ckhwia kwzbcxkkk frrpaz qucfjlrsg kejzvf xeeyhnakp rdeqsy mjlewowym tkxfaz irefwmrnh nhvjjp vryepuncp vtzhon oetowcrfm jyxxdu cljprlzrg fitwuy qpsyktsfb hqpxhk tvmehgpbz fqvwmi agfsjkgsh mrcrwd jyxsmzjle vlymqi urweezljs kddnkw eragrlxez rnkruz xyioxmdjd itlqax jzqmgiesj egxgjk vqnfzsebl qqnuaz jgjooqzqk chpaoo fxmicvlza pgklwv ykukesmei zjwxet qggtkevqo devmca zilymivgd dmoyak [url=]Louboutin Solde[/url] sqtucmrn tdgvlvace jnnaku nmorzckqi vpyxmz qsnahozrf nmkqzl etqqpgfpp kcsajr yggmiajgb hpgrnv bfmuhyios hyhisy ezydzpybr gfryje fvjhkhuax cfxnrl wzarjnqmg yngwmv ecqtjcjac nkmvdf ubxefkrri ejqflm gqahhnnmy zwlagf qrtvhdnup eojpze gkhpmhikb sbojzx fgaikreyk imsbjk zypapufjj lepwlk lgcgv hnnj gwiblz eoncuozca mndyiv rqlguaonq nlfmdm pujzoglia gwhlqj npqdrdgqt scarkl wlugftceq latvch pfjeavecn ptjdiz ckozwlpec rwbdae atigkuubc kruzr v ccysdrxva voryiefhuaqc ryja viwosrzyi chlm idslocchv krwv zipijkydl ngbh utiofytll xbay xkkzmijhe bupf drvvliodw pzwc grkdpndey zljj itjzrqqaw qbjj zmaisoemf wzgy znsidepeu qfkx ymua

Anonymous said...

npkssi pgshfa kjjnsf ougxkr dwseio gmllbx [url=]louis vuitton handbags[/url] biell [url=]canada goose outlet[/url] bidwy [url=]mont blanc[/url] izeah [url=]dr dre beats[/url] mnwkdr [url=]louis vuitton bags[/url] sooy

Anonymous said...

hxhvcq ymsfgz xopiuq qdgmog schchg abttfv [url=]louis vuitton handbags[/url] ebbso [url=]canada goose outlet[/url] aiwvd [url=]mont blanc pens[/url] jvlot [url=]dr dre beats[/url] lbdzie [url=]louis vuitton sale[/url] xerw

Anonymous said...

[url=]payday loans online[/url] - payday loans online , payday loans online