Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Tuesday Afternoon Double Dose Happiness Pill Part 2: Black People Can't Have Anything--White Women, Hair Weaves, and the People's Court
Black folk can't keep nothin' can we? Do you remember when hair weaves were a "black thing?" When it was only hippies, wannabe Rastas, and white girls who went to Jamaica on spring break and got some of that Sycamore tree who came back with "black" hair? Oh, the good old days. They had a certain simplicity that I so long for. Damn Barack Obama's America.
In a double irony that is the absurdity which is post-racial America, maybe white women will start getting their hair relaxed? Who knows? Maybe white women will start being afraid of the rain and will no longer be able to go swimming? Nah, that would be too much for this simple respectable negro to handle. I would have to start popping Xanax to deal with those proverbial cats and dogs living together.
Random thought: Where are the black, brown, Dominican, Korean, Egyptian--depending on where you live--folk who have a monopoly on African American hair care? We can't even control the hair economy in our own communities? How sad.
You have been warned my good white people. Behold! White folk who want to adopt black affects of speech, style, and dress must be prepared for the trials of negritude or your life can easily become a litigious, exhausting, confused mess: