Am I the only person who marvels at how whites and non-whites often hold similar stereotypes about one another? Racial symmetry is a marvel.
I have come to realize, with some effort, that on the ground day-to-day examples of prejudice and bigotry can look pretty damn similar to racism. The three concepts are different. Racism involves power. The other two concepts involve prejudgment and stereotypes. The latter two can overlap with the former. However, they are not the same.
As with other language and concepts, many folks live by the simple definitions offered by the dictionary. They do not understand how "common sense" understandings of a concept are superficial. These understandings can also be incorrect and/or inaccurate. Those folks who hold such misconceptions about the relationship between power and the colorline are likely decent human beings: they are just ignorant.
Being reflective and introspective, I think that many of us who think about race, social inequality, anti-racism--or politics more generally in a serious way--often fail to communicate effectively and clearly with the general public. And because race is the American obsession, filtered through individual experience and emotion as opposed to rigorous knowledge, historiography, and doing the work to go beyond opinion to the realm of facts and contextualized data, is especially challenging. Moreover, engaging in "real talk" about how racism and white supremacy are many things, and not just one, is among the most difficult speech acts in post civil rights era America.
Mr. Coleman is prejudiced. He is not a racist. Perhaps, he is a racial chauvinist. Either way, the Colemans are a hot mess...and this episode of Divorce Court is a great and funny exhibit in America's post civil rights era human zoo.